“Patience is a virtue”. I’ve heard it said, and so have you. But what is patience, really? Is it just forcing yourself to wait for things? To wait for others? To be happy without? I always thought patience meant I had to force myself to be “content” with the statue quo, until circumstances became more agreeable to me. It never really seemed fun to be patient. It was just a necessary attribute to live nicely in a world with others. Just another form of “domestication”, as Don Miguel Ruiz calls it.
Now my thoughts and feelings about patience have shifted dramatically. Instead of seeing it as something I need to muster, I now see it as a something that comes from inside. So basically; you have patience, or you don’t. You can fake it to muster through situations, but that’s not true patience. You’re just acting like you have it, but you actually don’t. Apparently, that’s what I had been doing. So what is “true patience”?
“True patience” comes from a place of knowing. A place of trust. It comes from a place of belief in yourself, and your place in the universe. When you know you are enough, you don’t “need” anything else to happen to add to your worthiness. When you know the universe is always looking out for you, you don’t need to force things to happen to make sure you are taken care of.
Before I met my true self (I tell the story in blog #9), I was very impatient and anxiety ridden. To the point of becoming sick. I had to learn the lesson of patience in order to heal myself and redirect my journey. Up to that point, I worried that things wouldn’t get done. So instead of relaxing and operating with patience, I muscled through, forcing things to happen. Forcing those around me into action. Panicking as I went. If it was going to happen, I had to do it. This behavior is built upon the underlying belief that I was lacking in someway. That myself, others, or the circumstances needed to change to make me feel ok.
As I have meditated and reformed my beliefs, I have created a foundation of patience in my life. I now know I am enough. Nothing needs to be added to me. I now know that everything is always working out for me. Nothing needs to change. I now sit back and watch as life unfolds; and I am truly able to enjoy the unfolding in all its joyous splendor.
Patience is a sign of trust. In yourself and in the universe.
Patience heals, soothes and restores you.
with love and belief, emilie